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Monday, November 6, 2017

Planescape - Blood War XXII. Divided's Ire

Last time, the group had their memories wiped clean. They awoke in an abyssal prison with no knowledge of who they were or how they got there.

They'd eventually learn that agents of Demogorgon had showed up and taken the heroes away. They brought them to a prison in Demogorgon's realm. The prison is known as Divided's Ire, and it is massively detailed in Dungeon Magazine #147.

The Party

(Jessie) Bidam - Platinum-Scaled Dragonborn Fighter
(George) Theran - Elf Wizard 

You might remember that Theran has a "side vagina", a little pocket in his abdomen where he keeps a ball of magical energy that stores his memory. You might also remember that wayyyy back when the group got in that epic fight with the genie in Limbo, that Renbuu the Slaad lord had quietly altered this ball as a prank.

So.. amnesiac prisoners notice the side vagina. Theran uses the ball. He gets his memory back... and turns into a golden slaad! Renbuu has Punk'd this young man, yes sir! George is not amused.

Two stealthy individuals creep up to the group's cell. It's their friend Fall from Grace and Wesley Powderbottom, the cherub who speaks in a widdle baby voice. They break the heroes out. They had gone on a quest to obtain Desert's Night, a flower that cures Styx amnesia. Bidam has his memory back!

Theran and Bidam learn that they've been in prison for a few weeks, and an army of their friends have come to save them. The group would eventually learn that Selinza the cat lady SOLD HER SOUL to Dispater's wife to find the location of Theran. Selinza loves Theran, but Theran gives her the stiff arm every time she makes a move. It's outrageous.

The heroes need their stuff! They have truckloads of magic items! Where are they? It turns out that this prison is broken up into wards and is run by powerful prisoners. The leaders divvied up the items.

So the heroes creep around, looking for ways to get their stuff back.


I had noted in a earlier recap that Jessie likes to "push buttons" and I had thought I should purposely put wacky stuff in my adventures for her to do this with. So... since my campaign is stupid.. Bidam found a Demogorgon throne radiating magic. Demogorgon's whole thing is having two head, right? Many of his minions have two heads. So Bidam sits on the throne and transforms.

You may recall that Bidam has four balls and a weiner with a dragon head on it. Now it has TWO DRAGON HEADS. I can't express to you the joy that this development brought the group. Jessie pointed out that she could now fire TWO laser beams of healing from her double dong. Achievement unlocked!

The heroes met forgotten concubines of Demogorgon and learned some stuff. They got two bad guys to fall in love with each other and got some of their gear back. As things progressed, the heroes freed prisoners and ended up with a small army of allies, rampaging through the prison looking for gear and a way home.

They didn't realized that a succubus infiltrated their ranks and quietly began killing off the escapees when she could get away with it.

The adventure culminated in a wild battle with a demon named S'Sharra. As the group fought her, the traitorous succubus dragged the escapees into a pillar of spinning death.  The heroes got to her and put her face-first into the pillar. Three escapees became new friends of the group:
  • Yantz Cogburn: A devil who talks like Morgan Freeman. I looked up a bunch of Morgan Freeman quotes and read them at appropriate times. The impression was apparently so bad that TO THIS DAY the group doesn't know it's a Morgan Freeman parody.
  • Amarysse: An angel who is basically Mary Poppins. I love doing a Mary Poppins voice.
  • Prophyra: A rebellious demon teenager. he was the breakout "star" of this group. She kept saying "you're not my dad!" and clearly, she needed a dad. The group broke through her crusty exterior and ended up bringing her to live with Bazuuma and Bidam's two dragon kids. Bidam's teenage son has a crush on her.
This adventure was wayyyy to hack and slash-y, but I was able to streamline it and make it work for our style.

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